It’s the beginning of week four of living pretty much on my own and I have – a bit too easily – compiled a list of the irritations, big and small, of this particular state of existence.
* No matter what you do, you always end up with a splotchy sunburn in the middle of your back, right where you can’t reach.
* When you go to make food that involves things in cans, the cans are always too big. For instance, if I want to make tuna casserole – And I do, I live off of this stuff – and I want to use mushroom soup as a sauce, I either end up with half a can of soup to compost or a plate of mushroom glop with a bit of casserole on the side.
* The washing machine is always half full and wasting energy.
* I have all these little things I want to tell someone and I collect them all in the back of my head. But eventually my mind just get’s grumpy and stops recording, so when at last I actually do get to talk to someone I can’t remember a damn thing I wanted to say.
* There’s no good role model to make me feel self conscious for eating Mr. Noodles at eleven at night while I watch entire seasons on netflix. This is both a blessing and a curse.
* There’s no one around to talk to so I end up getting into the habit of chattering away to myself. Which is all fine and dandy until I go out into civilization and accidentally collect a lot of weird looks.
* In every damn shiny surface I see a person and start freaking out as to why someone’s in my house. And then I realize that it is just my reflection.
* Noises that I once would have heard and thought “Oh, it’s just someone walking down the hallway” now end up with me panicking, going, “Holy crap, there’s someone walking down the hallway.” Even if neither of the sounds were footsteps in the first place.
* I make a lot more facebook posts. Little comments I might have simply made to whoever I was currently with, like, “Geez, the ferries are so expensive” now turn into “HELLO WORLD AND INTERNET, THE FERRIES COST A LOT OF MONEY.”
Anyways, there’s also a bunch of good things. No one judges me when I dance around the house like a crazy person, or talk to myself. I make the rules too – again, a blessing and a curse. But anyways, i hope you enjoyed!